Yesterday the kids got home from school at 3 and we started on homework. We worked pretty much straight through until 6. I was upset. For one thing, I never imagined the multi-tasking and chaos of having three children in school at the same time. When they were three little babies it was so much fun to have them close together but now that they're in school (specifically 4th and 5th) it is very hard! Don't get me wrong, I still love that they're close in age, I just have to step up my game a bit to make sure everyone is getting everything done that they need to get done.
My kids are actually really good at homework. I read John Rosemond's Homework Hassle book and liked it. We do a lot of things he recommends like: making sure they have a space in their room where they do it (alone), setting a time limit so it doesn't last all night, doing it right after school, losing privileges if it's not done (including missing their activities that I pay for!) etc.
Overall I think my kids are good at getting their homework done and they can mostly do it on their own. It's the big stuff, the weekly or monthly projects and the studying for tests that is killing me. Yesterday I had to help with the following:
research Jackie Robinson facts
help formulate thoughts/help write Jackie Robinson Essay
Proofread another essay
help research news report article
print pictures for a news report
proofread speech
test spelling words
test sight words
check math problems
test blending lines
Some of this I probably bring on myself because I don't give the kids free reign on the computer. I'm not going to just let them sit down and type things into google for information- that is way too dangerous in my opinion. So anything that's on the computer I have to be there helping. AND I could probably skip checking their problems but I like to make sure they're getting them right. The rest was pretty much necessary.
It was exhausting and I was mad because on top of all of that, my kids are required to do at least one family job a day and practice piano. And I'm required to make dinner, play with baby, drive them to their activities and keep the house in order (kindof).
Anyway, it was a rough night. The hardest part I've decided is not physically being there and doing the tasks, it is mentally dividing my brain into 5 sections and keeping everyone in their section in my brain. Does that even make sense?
So like in Lexi's section I have to keep the following:
Wednesday she finds out if she made drama club
Thursday she finds out if she was elected vp
she needs running shoes for p.e.
what time is her dance class today? (it's different each of the 3 days a week)
when is her book report due
has she started her news report?
get her to activity day on time
print pictures that she requested
remind her to wear her retainer
sit at the piano with her and go over songs
talk to her- make sure she's feeling ok about her speech
eye contact
take her to the library- she needs more books
find the book she lost
spend time doing something fun together
Logan's section:
Talk to him about drama tryouts
help him research jackie robinson
buy posterboard
help him write his presentation
get him to soccer on time
make sure he opens his books when practicing piano
talk to him about recess
make him clean his desk off so he can find his paper
remind him to turn conference note and progress report in!
brainstorm fattening food he will eat and make sure he eats enough
remind him to swish with salt water at night and help put wax on braces
organize the playdates his wants
haircut asap
rsvp to the party he keeps bugging me about
work on scouts
Macey:
talk to her about friend situation at school
remind her of things we're working on
bath/hair
figure out how much money I owe her and help her pay tithing/savings
spend time with her
make her clean all of her messes in each corner of the house
read with her before bed
blending lines
sight words
schedule dentist appt.
find bike lock so she can ride her bike to school and the begging will stop
call the mom she wants me to call that I don't know to get her daughter over asap
make sure she gets attention because she's been on the back burner
Mack:
(he's the easiest)
feed
kiss
diaper
bath
lotion
kiss
practice sitting up
find his missing bottle (I know it's somewhere with rotting milk inside!)
Dave:
who knows... but I love you!
Anyway, you get the point. And I know you've all been there. I'm just getting it out today and it feels good. I've actually never written each kids list out like this before and I think it's a good idea! I've always tried to keep them sorted in my brain and that's what has made me so tired. So from now on they will each have a list in my phone. And I'll keep preparing for that swing shift. It really is only 5 hours (3-8 or 9). I can manage the crazy for 5 hours right?
What do you guys do to stay sane?
And last thought: I love being a mom. I am in no way complaining. I feel stressed at times and yesterday was rough but today we have a lighter load and I plan to enjoy some relaxing with these guys. And maybe more homemade popsicles. I love that I get to stay home all day and I am thankful forever that Dave provides for me to do that. There's nothing like the end of the night when I crash on the couch for five minutes and everything is peaceful. Then we go upstairs and peak at them and say how cute (and how big) they are... that's the best part.
12 comments:
What I do to stay sane is to lower my expectations. Sounds terrible but it has given me freedom. I agree with your computer rules, but how about just being in the same room while they look things up, if they type it into google they should be okay probably? They do need to develop some autonomy while doing homework/research..can Lexi print the pictures she requested? Can she practice piano on her own? I just know now with 5 I have had to lower my expectations and give the kids a lot more independence on many things. Their practicing isn't perfect, their reports aren't perfect but they are learning independence and I am learning to give up the control! Not saying you want the control (I am a total control freak)...but some things it's okay if they aren't perfect, they can learn the lessons of doing things well on their own.
It is so hard to fit everything in! I try to multi-task. My kiddos are a bit older, (11 & 13)so I let them be responsible for their own school work. I clean nearby, or fix dinner while they are at the table or computer. I absolutely am available to help with questions, or advice, but it is their job to keep track of assignments and double check they have all the paperwork that needs to be turned in....if it is their job to remember-not mine-they do pretty good.
When I am playing taxi, driving kids to & from all their activities is usualy when we talk about what they have going on in their worlds.
I have to use the calandar on my phone too to keep track of all the stuff going on in their busy lives.
I year ya, sista. It is so, so, so, hard.
Being ready for the swing shift is really hard...but keeping up with the swing shift when you are in the throes of it is even harder.
I just try to stay sane by juggling it all at once...☺...some days are okay and some are kind of a disaster.
I feel ya... and i only have one in school! how about you figure out the madness and then let me know your secrets? sounds like you're doing a really great job... and your kids are really cute.
breathe. . . (you forgot that one) Denae you are going great! I like Cheryl's comments, try that.
Oh, I hear ya, Denae. Some days are so tough! We just started school here so we're getting into the routine and homework has only started with one kid so far.
On top of the homework, chores, and activities (scouts, activity days, soccer, etc) I want my kids to be able to play. To be able to hang out with friends, and drive cars through the living room and dress and undress Barbie.
Like you, I love being a sahm but there are days that it's super exhausting!
So glad I read your post today. We had a really rough day yesterday too, but I feel much better knowing we are not alone! 4th & 5th grade are killers!
you summed up my life lately. i've been teetering on the edge of sanity this school year. you'd think i'd have it down by now. maybe after fall break. i can hope!
Add in managing a veterinary hospital which requires me keeping the entire hospital stocked at all times, auditing charts, deposits, drug logs, and surgery because the tech is preggo, a full time wedding photography business, kids in pre school, soccer , gymnastics, etc....... I hear ya! My brain can't not take it any more!!!!!!!!! I have 3 calendars plus a to do note pad. I am going to explode! I am happy to know I am not alone . And my house is a disaster. :-(
Am going to start the beginning of my swing shifts with a battle cry. That way I am pumped ;)
I have 3 in school now too, and I am going crazy! I loved this post, becauase it is nuts to actually get it down on paper and see all that we are juggling as Moms. You are awesome, and have great ideas!
I want to hear how your mom would respond to these issues. I can totally identify. Although I didn't read through all the comments, I'm totally seconding Cheryl's. I have a kid that can't do what the average kid can in terms of classwork. I finally realized one day (early on) that I was freaking out on his behalf for nothing. I don't apply this approach across the board because there are lifeskills to be learned, but a lot of times I say, "so what?" "who cares?". You are great, Denae! I never like the rough days either and am so happy when occasionally, all the stars align and we have a great and productive day!
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