My favorite Mother's Day post so far this year is Brooke's. I like that she admitted to having weaknesses and that she is not perfect, but she listed the things she is good at and focused on being positive. We all have mom-guilt. We all know we're not perfect. It is easy to get down on ourselves for not being all we think we should be. But why worry about it? Worrying and feeling guilty is not productive so I'm going to be like Brooke and talk about what I'm good at.
But first, so that no one reading my blog thinks things are perfect (I don't know why anyone would) I'll tell you my struggles. I struggle with being patient after 6pm. I struggle to get kids into bed on time without getting mad, and I get super selfish around 8pm. I struggle with not letting their fighting get to me. I struggle with meal planning. We sit down together as a family for dinner but I am often grumpy about cooking and then mad when someone doesn't like what I made and complains to me about it. I struggle with their messy rooms. I want to be left alone at times. I'm usually behind on laundry. I wish I was more laid back, and I wish I always knew (right away) the best way to respond to a problem or issue that arises. I get mad and I yell. But we all do that right? I like to think I'm getting better with time. I pray to be more patient and I hope I am.
Now here is what I hope my kids will realize about me someday:
I am good at caring about my them. I care so much it hurts and I think about them, and my parenting, a lot. I'm good at recognizing when something isn't right with one of them and trying to figure it out. I'm good at listening and noticing non-verbal cues. I want them to be happy and I know that isn't always right because being sad and not getting what you want, and going through problems makes us better and stronger. But still, I want them to be happy and I try to make them happy as much as I can. I'm good at teaching them about Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and answering their questions about life. I'm good at making them work. It's hard and I hate it and it's not pretty most of the time. I try to turn up the music and make nice lists of their chores but yelling usually happens anyway. But I don't give up- I want them to be hard workers. I'm good at gathering our family together. I like us to do things as a group. Even though sometimes being all together is way more stressful for me, I think it's important so I do it. I'm good at finding fun things for us to do. I'm good at keeping my kids active and setting a good example for that. I'm good at defending them when they need it. They know I'll fight anyone I have to fight for them. Maybe I should let them fight their own battles, and I will, and I have, but I'll always be right behind them and they know that. I'm good at doing hair, making sure they have the clothes they need, signing them up for activities to try, getting them new books from the library, letting them have friends over, and keeping homemade cookies around the house. I'm good at hugging and kissing and scratching backs and telling them I love them. Somedays I try to remind myself that just being here for them is enough... I'm lucky I get to be here and I hope they are glad that I am.
Lastly I want to say- let's not judge eachothers mothering. Every mother is different and there is no one way to be a mother. Let's not fake it. Let's be real. We're all good at things and bad at other things. One woman's strength is another women's weakness. Why do we think our lives need to appear to be perfect? It only makes someone else feel bad. Being real is the only way it should be HOWEVER I do appreciate positive people. So being real and positive at the same time is the best combination.
For Mother's Day this year we met Susie at the beach (the day before) and spent a day hanging out and then went to dinner together. It was really fun. Mack hadn't been to the beach since the summer before and he was IN LOVE. He spent the day digging and digging in the sand and running from the water. He would just run back and forth over and over. What's cuter than a two year old running?? Nothing! Thus the 100 hundred pictures:
the sand totally makes it look like he has a 5 oclock shadow!
Me and my kids- I feel lucky and blessed that they're mine.
We got Susie an Itouch for Mothers day- she loves it and has really figured it out! Lexi and I gave her some tips and taught her some things and she picked it up quick. The kids picked out the turtle cover because she loves turtles. I'm excited she's gotten the hang of her new little device! We can now send her picture and video and she's even on Instagram!
Not to end on a sad note but... At the beach, Mack just rolled in the sand a little too much and ended up getting a lot in his eyes. We tried washing it out but he had already rubbed it too much, and then spent the next few hours crying. He would fall asleep and then wake up crying again. So we eventually took him to the ER- it is so not like him to cry a lot! They put dye in his eye and used an ultra violet light to see the scratch- he had a large circular one on the colored part of his eye. The doctor said it can be very painful so she gave us some pain meds and antibiotic drops. Luckily the eye heals very quickly and after 48 hours he was better. So when taking little ones to the beach bring baby powder to get all of that sand of of their face asap- just a little tip that I wish I had listened to! Even with that bad experience I can't wait to take him back. Kids and the beach = pure contagious happiness.
Thank you. The end.