On A Lighter Note

This post is for Andrea.  She needed something silly from my blog.  My blog has been kind of heavy lately.  I was going to blog about Buster my cat, because I still hate his guts, but I couldn't find a picture.  So I decided to blog about food.

Dear Mint Brownies,

It's been a long time.  I went through a phase where I was obsessed with you.  I made and devoured you almost weekly.  Then that love affair ended.  I needed a break.  Your richness was overwhelming and you took too much time to make.  I started snacking on Symphony bars instead.  

Well today was a special occasion- my friend's funeral.  For that, I decided to put forth the full effort and whip you up.  The moment my teeth sunk into you after all of this time, I recalled why I loved you so much in the beginning.  You are still as delicious as ever.  I hope to be more responsible in my love this time around.  

Thank you for cheering me up.  Thank you for being soooooooo good.

Lots of love,

D-dawg

(if you weren't reading me back in the mint brownie days, feel free to click the mint brownie link on my sidebar for the recipe.  But beware... they are dangerous.)

On Smelling my Child

I love when Macey is fresh and clean from the bath. Her curls make me so happy. They smell delicious and I love to bury my head in there and let it envelop me while feeling the softness of the curls. She might be sick of it. Sometimes I laugh to myself imagining me sneaking in her bedroom at night when she's 16 and fresh from a bath so that I can smell her. At some point her deliciousness will end, I'm sure. But until then I'm going to enjoy it all I can.

My Grandma A and Living Off the Land in Peace and Quiet

When we were in Washington we got to visit my Grandma A at her cute little house where she lives with her husband George. She served us fresh squeezed grape juice and we ate peas from her big garden. They have lots of beautiful flowers and a red front door. Their house has a view and sits alone in the countryside. It made me want to grow things, live in a more peaceful world, and be more like my Grandma.

My Friend

Can life please stop being sad.

A close friend of mine passed away last week after a long battle with cancer.  I miss her, and my heart is broken for her husband and children.  Death can seem so final sometimes.  It hurts so much to think she is not around the corner anymore.  That I can't walk over and say hello whenever I want to.  That I can't call her up and see how she's doing, or carry a pile of books up to her door for her to read.  She was one of the strongest people I've ever known and a huge example to me.  I will always think of her strength and bravery when I am faced with a trial.  I will try to be as faithful and positive as she was.  I will remember her smile and her sweet spirit and I will try to live my life the way she lived hers.  She left an imprint on my heart and I know I am a better person because of her friendship.  My Heavenly Father blessed me with a few sweet moments with her on the day she passed on.  I feel unworthy of those moments but I am so grateful for them.

Family

Are we bad foster parents because we feed our 9 month old otter pops?  She really likes them.

Does anyone still check my blog?  

I've been gone because a very loved family member (my dad's brother, my Uncle Bob) passed away.  It has been very sad and hard for everyone.  I went on a little (12 hour) road trip up to his funeral.   I think all of us cousins were there except two- that was neat.  There were lots of stories of Uncle Bob shared and so many of them were funny and sweet.  I've been able to share them with my kids and I hope to teach them to be more aware of their extended family and follow the good examples they have in their relatives.

It was sad but also a spiritual time for our family.  My Uncle's funeral was wonderful and I felt so comforted by the words that were spoken by his children and another uncle of mine.  I have a strong belief in life after death.  I know that families can be together forever and I look forward to that day when all of us will be reunited and live again.  

The darkness of death can ever be dispelled by the light of revealed truth. “I am the

 resurrection, and the life,” spoke the Master. “He that

 believeth in me, though he

 were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.”

I have an amazing extended family.  They are awesome people that I love, admire, and hope to be like someday.  We are all very close and it is a huge blessing in my life.  I am so thankful for the family I come from.

All eight of my parent's children were able to make it to the funeral.  We haven't all been together in years. 

(birth order)

 Angie and I shared a full size bed at my Grandma's house.  It was like we were kids again.  It was very "cozy" now that we're so much bigger.  One night in our sleep I stole her knee pillow.  She waited until I stirred and then stole it back.  We had some good laughs in that little bed and a lot of fun reminiscing. 

Dave stayed home with our kids so I could make the last minute trip up to Washington.  Thank you Dave!  I was very nervous about leaving CC but I had no other choice.  It turned out to be very good for their relationship.  She is now completely comfortable and trusting of Dave and that is a great thing for all of us.  When I got home she gave me a big sweet smile and kicked her legs really fast for awhile.  I liked it.  She was happy to see me.  Oh yeah, and she decided to start walking while I was away! 

Death by Graduation

I have now officially attended 6 of my 7 siblings' graduation ceremonies.  There is one left to go.  I was a teense suicidal over it this year when Kaley's came around.  Don't get me wrong, I am SO proud of her accomplishment and I love her to pieces.  It's just that I've sat through a few too many ceremony's at the Concord Pavillion, searching for the small, capped head in the crowd.  Trying to take a photo of the special moment from yards away, cheering as loud as I can when my sibling's name is called.  I should have titled this post, "sister of the century" because that is what I am.  I am the most supportive sister I know!  I deserve a present.  

So, my sis lucked out this year because graduation was the same week that Dustin got home so lots of people were here for her.  We screamed the loudest our of everyone and even did a huge dance with her at the end of the ceremony.  She had lots of love.  And to tell you the truth, the ceremony wasn't that bad this year because none of my children were there, and I had my iphone to play on, and my camera to mess around with.  I kept myself entertained.  When Landon graduates in four years I am officially done with sibling graduations.  I will then have a five year break until my own children's graduations start happening.  Just thought you'd like to know.  Now for the photos of the evening. 

 

The graduate!!  Kaley we knew you could do it- great job!

The fans

Bothering Dustin with my picture taking

Landon- next in line.  

Kaley recieves the diploma.  Except it's not even really in there and later when she went to pick it up they couldn't find it.  Her friend had picked it up for her so it's all ok.

I have attended three of these people's graduation.  You're welcome you guys.

Brett and Em- married twins.

Dev and Kim.  How did all of my brothers snag such hot wives?

Baby Wyatt was a trooper.  It was cold when the sun went down and that East Bay breeze came up.

The proud father. 

The proud mother.

The End.

Fruit Picking Outing

We picked Cherries last week while the husbands golfed.  

To tell you the truth, I didn't really pick much, I just took pictures.  And watched my mom and Marilyn ooooh and aaaah over the fruit.  And watched Bennet get juice all over his face.   And acted out a scene from the garden of eden.

The kids loved it and could have picked all day.  We also picked peaches and my mom made a yummy peach cobler that I am still thinking about a week later.

CC Almost One Month Later

This is CC's pouty, shy face which we almost never see anymore so I'm glad I got it captured when I did.

It has been almost a month since she came and everyday she gets better.  It was so amazing to see her change from a nervous, unhappy, scared baby to a content and playful one.  It is crazy how different she is today from the day she came.  We all just love her so much.  I still bounce her to sleep and I mostly love it (minus the back pain).  I love how she calms down in my arms whenever something upsets her.  Although feeding solids has never been a favorite thing of mine, it is so fun to watch her face when she tries a new food.  I love watching my kids interact with her.  This morning Lexi got her out of bed in the morning and played with her in her room for awhile before she woke me up!  Macey was kissing her later today and got her poor little lip bit.  Logan asked for a turn to sit by her in the car and he talks in baby talk and it is darling.

I will admit it is still hard.  Foster care is an emotional rollercoaster.  Everyday I go from deciding we probably won't do it again, to thinking it's the best thing we've ever done.  At least one time a day I think, "why did I think I could do this?"  It might end up being too sad for me.  Only time will tell if we can handle the emotions of it.

She has some visits scheduled in the next week and I'm feeling protective.  I have to keep reminding myself she is not my baby and parents have rights to see their child and know that she is ok.  I wish I could go with her though.  I'm so curious to know what goes on in her little mind.  Will she remember them?  Will she wonder where I went?  Will she be scared?

One more thing about CC is she loves action.  I have found that she is most happy when there are lots of people around and we are doing something like playing outside, or shopping at the store.  She was so good last week when my family was in town.  She would just crawl around and attack the other babies by crawling on them and trying to sit on them, or grabbing my moms decorations and pulling them on her head.  She loves my sister Kaley too which is fun.  She goes to my other siblings and my parents too.  She is pretty much friendly with most people now (if she is well rested and fed).

And that, is the update.

Return of Brother #4

Well, my brother returned home from his mission last week.  It is always so fun to pick up a missionary who has been gone for two years.  Someone (me) had the bright idea to borrow a huge van so that we could all drive to and from the airport together.  It was pretty much a nightmare.  The van was really old and few of us had seat belts.  The kids were all sharing belts and squished in the back seat.  It was so unsafe.  Also my dad was driving and (no offense dad) but it was a little scary plus we had to drive on 880 in Oakland and that freeway is like a death trap.  But we made it through alive.  After we got Dustin he had to squish in too.  He had to squish in with 100 people plus sit and listen to our kids yelling and screaming from the back the whole time- it was a great welcome home party.

Here we are heading into the airport.  We are such a spectacle.

Waiting with anticipation...

The first glimpse of him coming around the corner!

Now, if this face does not scream excitement I don't know what does.  I'm so glad he was happy to see us!

Isn't he cute?

He looks all grown up to me.

Welcome home Dusters.  We're so glad you're back!

I Hope I Can Sleep Tonight

My little brother Dustin comes home from his two year mission for our church, TOMORROW! It feels like Christmas. I'm so excited to see him!


(this photo was taken about 2 years ago when he left. Things have changed!)

Documenting Everyday Life

This post is an attempt to catch up on documenting some activities we've been doing lately.  Sometimes I forget to blog about what my family is up to and I know someday I'll be sad about that.  

Lexi has been involved in an awesome dance class.  Her teacher is amazing and the class is full of girls from church that she likes.  They worked for awhile on a dance dedicated to a little girl that died of cancer here in Brentwood.  It was really sweet.  A couple of Saturdays ago they got to perform in a show with some other dance companies at the Inter-stake center in Oakland by the temple.  It was a big deal and she had so much fun.  Of course I missed the chance to get a picture of her in her real costume but here she is with her full make up on- that was her favorite part.

Grandma and Grandpa came and here they are demonstrating some of their own dance moves.  There were a lot of different dances performed- all of them modern dance.  Let's just say that some were very interesting.  It made me want to make up one of my own.

Lexi also had her school musical.  It was called "dinomotion" and was seriously the cutest school musical ever.  Great music, great moves and all about dinosaurs which is something they study in second grade.  

Logan played baseball this year for the first time.  It was good.  He was put on an awesome team with the most caring, kind, and motivational coach.  I seriously loved his coach.  He almost made me cry a few times with how sweet and encouraging and just nice he was to Logan.  He said some things to him about his game that Logan was so proud of.  Logan totally wanted to do well for his coach.  There 

were a few dads that helped with practices and they were awesome too.  Logan had a great season and is totally into it now.  It was a lot of practices and games.  

It's funny because I said we would never do baseball but it turned out to be a really great sport for Logan.

Macey goes to the best preschool in the world and was busy these last few weeks with fun preschool festivities.  They always do a big mother's day lunch with delicious food for the moms and the kids sing to us and serve us our food and drinks.  It is adorable.

She also has the cutest friends.  Look at these girls.  The thing I love the most is they are all so similar and into the same things.  When she has playdates with them they play the whole time and their conversations with each other are darling.  One of these girls is going off to kindergarten next year and we are sad about it.

The last week of preschool they have pajama day, water day and park day.  Water day might have been the best day of Macey's life.  She acted like she had never played in the water before or something.  She had her suit on at 6:30am.  

CC has been busy being cute and being spoiled.  I started off with good intentions but slowly over time I was beat down and I now bounce her to sleep at night!  What?!  At 8 months old?  This is not something I believe in.  Luckily if I bounce her she is asleep in 5 minutes, whereas if I just put her in her bed it takes much longer than that.  I don't really mind holding her as she drifts off to sleep.  It is too sweet.  It breaks my back a little bit though since she is kind of giant.

Logan Turns 7!

Yesterday was Logan's birthday- he turned 7.  He started the day off with breakfast in bed.  He is an early riser and woke up before I had the food ready so I made him get back in bed with his clothes on and wait for me.

Then later in the day I took some donuts for Logan to share with his class.

For his family party his grandma and grandmpa B came and uncle Landon and Kaley.  We had dinner, presents, cake and relay races (that's what he wanted).

A few days earlier grandma Susie came for a visit and gave Logan Super Mario Party 8, he was thrilled.

My mom made his cake for me because I was busy and have a fourth child now (what?! How did I think this would be no big deal?).  It turned out super cool with a volcano and star wars figures.  He loved it.

Please notice Macey's expression toward my dad in this picture.  He is a big tease and

 lately she is always acting annoyed with his teasing.  It is funny and I hope he contines to tease her until she just accepts it as part of life- that's how my grandpa was.

Cutest seven year old ever.  He is such a good boy.  I hope he had a good birthday - he has been looking forward to it so much this year.  Tomorrow night he is having a little friend party.  They are going to watch a movie and stay up till 9 together!  That is late for him (and me).

If you made it to the end of this post, and you have an iphone, please comment and tell me the best apps to get. I have a few but want more. I'm addicted.  I just bought the scriptures app today.

Another Update

WOW.  Today was amazing compared to the last six.  CC was so happy.  She spent the whole day crawling around, playing with her toys and smiling.  I am a prisoner no longer!  I was able to leave the room occasionally for a few minutes and she played and didn't cry.  I was able to put her down and do a few things!  I know it was only six days, but six days of holding a little person continually (or be subjected to screaming) was rough.  

She is a little sweet heart.  I realize she was completely in survival mode and just trying to cope with all of the strangeness in her new situation.  I am sad if I think too much about all she has been through.  I'm so glad that she adjusted so quickly, it could have taken much longer.  She is still a little bit unpredictable.  I have been writing down everything she does and at what time (eats, sleeps, plays etc)-  I'm hoping a schedule will emerge.  I'm starting to understand what she wants when she wants something.  But there are still moments when she surprises me and gets upset and I'm not sure why.  I think she has thrown a few tantrums too.  I'm sure she has felt frustrated with me as I'm trying to figure her out.  

I am so thankful that I can make her smile and calm her when she cries.  I was definitely not prepared for a crawler/walker though. I don't know if I can keep my floor mopped that frequently!   Tonight as I unloaded the dishwasher she climbed right up and tried to help me (made it more difficult).  But that is the age she is in and it is so fun too.  She's still warming up to Dave.  I was hoping this weekend she would accept him but it might take another week or so.

She loves, loves, loves and adores my children.  She laughs at them so much and just stares and watches everything they do.  All three of them have been able to "babysit" for me so I could get a few things done around the house.  She is mostly happy when they are paying attention to her and pushing her around in her stroller.

Having a baby around has already done things for my kids that I wanted it to do for them.  They are looking out for her, praying for her, learning how to take care of her, and just loving her.  Macey and Lexi have both fed her solids and bottles.  They watch me bathe her and change her diaper and they feel so proud of themselves when they can keep her happy for awhile.  It has also slowed me down which is something I wanted.  The morning before I got the call to pick her up I had a to-do list in my head a mile long.  After I got her, I seriously couldn't remember very much from that list.  It made me realize none of it was that crucial or important.  I did almost nothing last week and we just hung around trying to keep this baby happy.

Anyway, this post has gotten way too long.  Even with CC around I am trying to continue doing photography because I love it so much.  I know I won't have as much time but I was able to just get some senior pictures done this week.  They are of a girl in my ward and I had a blast photographing her.  Go see them here if you want to.  

I couldn't resist buying them matching jammies. I am only in this picture becuase CC would not sit alone. Also, if my eyes look tired, it's because they are.

Yesterday was me and Dave's 10 year anniversary. I love him for a lot of reasons, but the two main one's at this moment are:

1. He bought me an I-phone. It is my new best friend. It slept on my nightstand last night.

2. He supports me in everything- even things that we might, at first, think are a little crazy. Like foster care. It's been a wild week. Yesterday morning I was trying to get the kids ready and off to school, CC was having a difficult morning (aka crying a lot) and Dave was heading out the door for work. He could have looked around and said, "what have you gotten us into to???" or "this is insane- that baby is never going to stop crying and we're going to go crazy!!!" or "I'm outta here!' (thoughts that I might have been having (o:)

Instead he kissed me goodbye and said, good luck. And he said something like, "well- 10 years later and here we are!!" It was funny. Then I found a nice, encouraging note later on my keyboard. Oh, and the Iphone was secretly plugged in where my old cell was! He is my favorite person in the world and I couldn't have asked for a more supportive and kind person to marry.

Happy 10 years to us! My mother in law was here for the night and we sneaked off to a little dinner.

Baby update: CC is still sleeping through the night, still wanting me to hold her all of the time (I'm a little exhausted), still feeling sad around strangers, and still having very rough mornings. But she is also playing on her own more, eating solids better, crawling around for a few minutes at a time, playing with toys in her high chair, feeding herself puffs, and smiling and laughing a lot- especially when we go shopping. She loves the kids and lets Lexi hold and feed her so I get a little break and that is nice!

CC

We're going to call my new baby CC.

Guess what? CC loves me. She really has attached herself to me. I feel thankful. These last two days have been a doozy!! She slept 12 hours last night (woke up once for a SMALL bottle at midnight and went right back to sleep) and that gave me strength to carry on.

When she woke up in the morning the fear started again though. She cried for a couple of hours and didn't want to eat or do anything. Think about being taken from everyone you know and finding yourself in a strange place with strangers all around (and these strangers look a little different than the people you're used to)! It would make anyone upset. She is nervous, a little jumpy, and definitely wary of strangers. Luckily, in 2 short days she has gotten used to me and my kids. When Dave looks at her though she buries her face in my chest. She will let Lexi hold her and she smiles a lot at Logan and Macey when they talk to her. Today she had some sad moments but some really happy ones too. She even let me put her down once or twice. I had to sit RIGHT next to her, and she had to be touching my leg, but she sat on the floor so that was very good.

She loves to be outside and when she gets upset and sad we take her in the backyard and she calms down and looks up at the trees.

Two essential things have happened that have helped. She is getting sleep, and I am managing her teeth pain. When I picked her up they said she was only a 15 minute cat napper and woke up 3-4 times a night. She was biting everything, pulling on her ears and drooling all over the place. Well, we've gotten her a cozy room, and some motrin and that has helped. Her naps have been 2 hours, two times a day! Poor baby just needed some sleep. By the way, she is 8 months old, not 10. We had her birthday wrong yesterday.

That's the update for now. My muscles are sore and remember, I'm still signed up for that half marathon so I've gotta get up and run at 6AM!