I hate tax season as we all know.
Every year during this time I have to write a post about it and its horribleness.
My husband is never home for a few months and that is a long time. It feels like forever. When he is home during this time all he has time to do is sleep. That means not much help with kids, housework, yard work, fix it up projects, garage cleaning, or emotional support. That means no one to deliver my nightly monologue to. It is really hard. He hates it, I hate it, there is a lot of hate going on. I do have to say that he does his very best to stretch himself and fulfill his other responsibilities. He still tries to help me but it is a struggle for all of us.
I miss him too.
AND I worry about him driving his commute on 5 hours of sleep. It is ridiculous.
There really is no solution. We tried to set up a home office so he could work here. It is impossible. He hears the commotion outside of the office and has to come out. Then he gets distracted and starts doing other things. Then he goes back in to start working again and one of the kids goes in to "chat." Then I come in and threaten that child with death if they do not leave him alone. Then I ask him to do something, accidentally, because I forgot that I just threatened my child. Then he comes out to help me with something. Then he offers to go grocery shopping for me. And how can I resist that? (I hate grocery shopping).
Working from home is not an option for us.
It reminds me when we were married and in college and could not study together because we would just end up leaving and getting lunch, or talking about everything else except school.
Dave and I together have very little self control.
I have none, myself. He has a little.
I am really struggling with my lack of self control. I want to get it under control but I can't make myself do it (see?). I try to control every one else but I can't control my own self. I eat whatever I want, whenever I want to eat it. I do whatever I want to do, whenever I want to do it. I can't get to bed at a decent hour to save my life, and I can't stop eating treats or start exercising. I feel like a big lump of indulgence.
Today I tried to not eat treats all day. I made it until 6:45 pm and I was so proud of myself. The reason I indulged at 6:45 pm is because I decided it was pointless to live without treats during hard times (and Easter). I might try again when tax season ends but for now I am filling the husband void with candy.
On the menu for tonight: a cadbury cream egg and at least three of every other kind of candy the easter bunny has hiding in my closet.
15 comments:
I literally salivated looking at that creme egg. I asked my mom today to buy me some when they are half off on Monday and to keep them at her house so I would have to drive to have one. I think this is one of my best ideas yet. Sorry Dave is gone so much but he will be all yours again soon. It's already April 1st (tomorrow but close enough.)
I love you Denae! I know you are frustrated but this post was so you and so funny. One thing I love about you is how much you and Dave like each other. I am so sorry he is gone so much--that really does suck! You deserve to hire a handyman and a maid and a babysitter to get you through. Or at least eat the Easter treats guiltlessly. I feel bad about them too but Easter candy is seriously THE BEST.
I just love you, Denae. You really are just so darling. I don't mean that in a condescending way...it kind of came across like a pat on the head that you would give a puppy...I just mean, I love how honest you are and every time you write you are so endearing.
Single motherhood really is the pits. I don't know how some women do it. It is, "busy season" for my husband at work, so he gets home late, and then he goes back to the bedroom because he has to prepare his Seminary lesson so I get weepy.
I have to deliver my nightly momologue, too. The poor man is trying to doze off but I have to tell him all about my thoughts and feelings or I get sad.
Easter candy is too wonderful to go without.
Oh Denae,
If you're single-mom-ing it at the same time that you're healing the hole that was left in your heart by the leaving of those babies, I don't think there is anything wrong with indulging in as much candy as you want AND putting of exercising until things settle down a bit.
. . . of course, that very philosophy is probably why I had to go out and buy new (bigger) jeans last week. Maybe I'm not the best person to be doling out the advice.
Seriously though--if your kids are clothed & fed every day and relatively happy, and the sanitation department isn't coming over to condemn your house because it's a health hazard to others, I think you can pat yourself on the back.
(Pat, pat, pat.)
Denae, you are really very cute, even in venting mode. I have a busy hubby too and I always wonder why I keep holding out hope that he's going to be home at any point during the day (or night) for him to help out, talk to, hang-out with or anything else. But I guess hope is what keeps me going. That, and after I get over the initial disappointment of him not being here, I decide I am going to do something that I like, something that I wouldn't be doing if he was here, like scrapbooking or watching a movie or tv show that only I like. It really does take some of the sting off.
So here's to a smooth tax season (hmm, I'm wishing it for us too) and just remember only 15 days left, but who's counting.
You go right ahead and complain. This is the time of year that stinks for you. I only had to live through this twice, and this was pre-children. Studying for New York Bar exam, (husband gone all the time), then studying for California Bar exam (husband, again gone for weeks at a time). No one to yammer on to at night. Did you see 30 Rock about the new cable channel for women? A man just sits and listens to you. Because according to the cable execs, all women have the insatiable desire to "yammer on". It is genetic, we can't help it. It will be over in two weeks! Until then, you have your blog and your readers!
Never give up treats during tax season! My husband is a CPA too. I can sympathize. It has been a lonely dreadful one with this constant rainy weather. We tried the work from home thing too, and that lasted not even one day! This is the first year he has ever been able to take Sundays off, so it's been nice for that though he naps the afternoon away. I could go on and on as you well know.....2 more weeks from today!!!
Denae, you know why I just love reading your blog? You are so true to life! You don't try to pretend to be a super-hero, and allow yourself to be human. Yet you accomplish so many wonderful things! It is nice to hear that other people cry, indulge in chocolate, forget their husbands are supposed to be working, and go on rants. Thank you for sharing your rants. And despite (or perhaps because of) your rants, I know that your family is happy and you are accomplishing great things!
I'm enjoying your venting because it makes me feel better about how grouchy i am when Trent is gone. And talk about no self control. I have 0.
Denae, you are entirely too lovable for me to read this and not laugh a little and yet feel sorry for you at the same time. Has anybody hated you or not liked you your entire life? I'm guessing they haven't. What's not to like?
Maybe I'll eat a cadbury creme egg in your honor tonight. Just because.
I feel ya Denae! Jeff is an attorney at a firm here in DC and his hours are insane ALL YEAR!! He gets home most nights after 10 and has to work on weekends quite a bit. I rely on friends and I call my sisters all the time. Sometimes I break down and he takes the kids to breakfast on a Saturday before work. I hired a cleaning service that comes twice a month to stay sane. I eat a lot of treats too and then tell my kids they can't have them. I need something to look forward to. Go ahead and eat your treats. I have to work mine off though. I will keep you in the single mom prayers. We have great ambitious husbands but sometimes that is hard. I know how you feel.
I am looking forward to Robin Eggs this weekend.
cadbury eggs are my fave easter candy of all time! In fact, I just ate one for dessert tonight. and I only have 2 left in my cupboard...which reminds me that I need to go stock up this weekend before all the easter candy is gone cuz I am always depressed when there are no more cadbury eggs and I have to wait a whole year for them to come out again.
I'm sorry tax season sucks. but at least it falls around the easter holiday so that you can use cadbury eggs to help fill the void.
Dear Denae I've been thinking about you a lot lately and getting updates from C. I am so sorry you are going such a hard time with everything and you deserve to feel like crap.Since I'm the current expert in feeling like crap, I will join you in the pity party.
Dear Denae I've been thinking about you a lot lately and getting updates from C. I am so sorry you are going such a hard time with everything and you deserve to feel like crap.Since I'm the current expert in feeling like crap, I will join you in the pity party.
Have you tried the Royal Dark Mini Eggs, yet? (Also a Cadbury product) "Solid Dark Chocolate With A Crisp Sugar Shell". They're my new favorite. Go buy a bag for yourself and don't share it with ANYONE.
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